How common are au pair scams?

Scam attempts are common on any open platform; completed scams are much rarer because the patterns are recognizable. The single most effective protection: never send money, and never proceed without live video contact and a written contract.

Is it safe to be an au pair as a woman?

Millions of young women complete au pair stays safely every year. The relevant precautions are the ones on this page: verified families, a contract, insurance, your own documents and money, an emergency fund and contacts outside the household.

What should I do if my host family takes my passport?

Ask for it back once, in writing. If it is not returned immediately, contact your embassy and the local police. Withholding another person's identity documents is illegal in most jurisdictions and a recognized indicator of exploitation.

Where can au pairs get help in a crisis?

Local emergency services, your country's embassy or consulate, your agency or platform's support team, and — in many countries — dedicated counseling services for young people abroad. Save these numbers in your phone before departure.

Safety

Au Pair Safety: Red Flags, Scam Prevention and Emergency Planning

The vast majority of au pair stays are positive — but the model's trust-based nature attracts scammers, and living in a stranger's household requires sensible precautions. This page covers prevention for both sides: before matching, during the stay and in emergencies.

Scams: the patterns to know

The “family” that asks for money: fake families request payments for visas, flights, “agency fees” or customs. Legitimate families never ask au pairs for money. Never.
The too-good offer: unusually high “salary”, few duties, luxury photos, immediate acceptance without a video call — classic bait.
The fake check / overpayment: a “family” sends a check and asks you to forward part of the money. The check bounces; your transfer is gone.
Off-platform pressure: scammers push to leave the platform's messaging immediately, where safety teams can't see the conversation.
Fake agencies: demand upfront fees, have no verifiable address, imprint or registration. Check the company register of their country.

Verify before you commit

Multiple video calls showing the actual home and all family members / the actual applicant
References you contact yourself — former au pairs for families, childcare references for au pairs
An address you can verify (map check, utility bill, employer)
A proper written contract before any booking
Reverse-image-search profile photos if anything feels off

Safety during the stay — for au pairs

Keep your passport and documents in your own possession at all times
Have your own bank account; never hand your card or PIN to anyone
Save emergency numbers: local emergency services, your country's embassy, your agency/platform contact, one trusted person at home
Know your address by heart from day one
Keep enough money for a flight home untouched (“emergency fund”)
Build contacts outside the family: language course, au pair meetups, sports

Safety during the stay — for host families

Check identity documents against the profile and references
Introduce child safety rules, emergency contacts and first-aid basics in week one
Clarify driving: license validity, practice drives, insurance coverage
Agree on rules for social media featuring your children
Take mental health seriously — homesickness is normal; isolation is not

If something goes seriously wrong

In acute danger, call the local emergency number first (112 across the EU, 911 in the USA). Then: leave the situation — au pairs owe nobody a stay in an unsafe household; contact your embassy or consulate, which assists citizens abroad; inform your agency or the matching platform's trust & safety team; document what happened (photos, messages, dates); and involve the police for theft, threats, harassment or withheld documents. Confiscating an au pair's passport is not a house rule — it is a serious offense in most countries.